Ni(i)ra badnam hui...

TRUTH be told (of course, with all its biases) – Ni(i)ra Radia floors.

The other day, I sat in front of a bureaucrat friend with the new old ethic of journalism – do not proffer anything even to a friend. Sipping his service tea he wondered loud, “Where is this country heading.” I too sipped from my cup and wondered equally loud, “Well. Even Radia is wondering about that in the tapes.” Laughter.

I had almost decided let me not get into it…it’s about the life and times of names big enough to be almost beyond normal aspirations …well almost… but the worm of print (print-ka-kida?) and the ironies that keep hitting at one listening to the tapes at the speed of Shatabdi’s clatter just nudged me into this… So here it is.

All that comes out of the tapes is that when journalists are busy being go-betweens…editors discussing best wordings for an apology…corporate honchos busy making cabinets… politicians busy making money…bureaucrats ghost writing columns for honchos…judges letting mothers decide India’s gas distribution…she is the only one busy doing her job…!!!

Source. Boss. People’s Rentier. Entrepreneur. Businesswoman. Philanthropist. Lobbyist. Nationalist. Newswoman. News-planter. News-trader. Economist. Airline industry expert. Protector of India’s natural resources. Refuser of kickbacks. Caste politician. Corporate diplomat. Legal brain. Mother. Power-broker.

Now count it backwards. Twenty-one roles for a woman on phone, on phone, on phone, morning, evening, night. She is the constant. Even when she has seven stitches in her mouth. Rest is the grudging world. Or happily in submission.

Here is one person who knows her job. And the job of everyone else in the world. Almost (You know, High court judges do not understand Economics).

She knows about the unfolding Air India story better than the reporter who calls up to inform her of the development (Ya, ya, I have dossier on last 5 years of Praful Patel). She understands technology (in 5 MHz 3G can be started but it wont be efficient). Manages to advise a minister on how not to blush when taking the name of his crush. Understands the difference between a respondent and an intervener in legalese.

To my fraternity. She has her hand on the falling standards of journalism. And is positively concerned: “…I have 10 stories on my table and eight of them are incorrect. Somebody is having you on. It’s absolutely incorrect. Who’s spreading this? Which lobbyist?” is how an Editor is hectored. And is on top of even tickers and news flashes (congratulates an editor on one!) even as her junior warriors find reporters leeches.

Ratan is Ratannnnnnn…Sunil is Suuuuuunil….Manoj is Mannnnnoj.

Goddess. Coaxes and cajoles. Persuades and flatters. Sweet-talks and wheedles, entices and inveigles. And knows when to push the envelope (either page one lead or I go to the rival newspaper).

And for having nation’s biggest pants-down scam in her hands what does she get in return? Here’s Raja’s verdict for the Rani: “To show my performance I have to get the 500 million mark in subscriber base. If it’s coming from Anil’s fudged accounts and not Tata, its fine with me Ni(i)ra!!!” Can something be more saintly?

And finally. Two counts for wanting Radia like boss (only because asking her to be the boss is so too risky now!): in between the hectic conversations she asks a subordinate, “Khana Khaya?...” and on an assignment, tells another to stay at the Taj (of Mumbai) and not the company guest house.

Now who would not want a boss like that, boss?